Shit, I don't know. Yet, this is the most-asked question from friends, acquaintances, and curious strangers. The easiest answer is "Pop," an umbrella of negative-connotation that I hate to seek shelter beneath. To me, pop music is the ear-raping, factory-generated insult to my sanity that they wear out on KIIS FM and the like. More in-depth examination, however, reveals that some of my favorite artists of all time have been labeled with that same three-letter word. Basically, if it has two verses, a bridge, and a memorable chorus weaved throughout, it's considered Pop...regardless of whether the lyrics have substance or not.

Cat Stevens*, for instance, injected a depth into his songs that pretty much anyone in the world could connect and identify with. Unlike some of the rambling, whiny singer-songwriters out there, however, his choruses were clearly structured and instantly stuck in one's head (hence the term "hook"), making it attractive for radio play. More than merely being "music for the times," his songs are still played decades later, which makes them "timeless." When examined in that light, writing "popular music" doesn't seem like such a bad thing!

Be that as it may, the stigma attached to Pop is still an unattractive one, no thanks to Britney Spears, T-Pain, and (god help me) Ke$ha. I try to come up with names for my particular style that suit me without sounding vomitously pretentious, such as "Sultry Songs With Soul" or "Lyrical, Progressive Electronica"...which feels like a mouthful of bullshit that still doesn't add up to the sum of my parts.

"What kind of music do you play?"

"What's your style?"

"What genre would you say your music fits into?"

And there it is. They want to know where I fit in, how they can label me in a way that's easy to understand. Are we really that lazy? I have my own voice, my own style of writing, and musical arrangements that evolve stylistically based on who I work with. I am an old soul with a young spirit and an ageless dream...and that's precisely what my music sounds like.

"Pop," I reply, at a loss, "but not like that shit they're playing on the radio."

*For a quick lesson in Cat Stevens 101, rent 'Harold And Maude,' a brilliant film that found the perfect soundtrack.

The Neave is finally back up and running! The new format messed up some of the punctuation, though, so I've been combing through every article, trying to clean them up. I came across an older story of mine that will give you a little glimpse at the experiences that brought me to where I am today. Click here to read my musically triggered memories, and feel free to browse around the redesigned site to see what you think!

In Los Angeles, my feathers are ruffled by ghosts of the past messing with the present and dooming the future. Home is where the heart - and heartbreak - can be found. I write songs to vent, some of which may never see the light of day, but at least provide a release.

It's the dawning realization of let-down that grows stronger as I age. The little girl I once was pictures a giant, placed high on a pedestal, bathed in glowing light. As the years passed, the foundation crumbled. The giant fell slowly, but steadily, never reaching the wreckage below, but remaining in a constant state of descent. Its childish mentality of insane denial and dangerous misinterpretation of reality continue to be devastating. I've alternately wept, been paralyzed by anxiety, grown furious, ranted, pondered, rationalized, explained, sought closure and always, always hoped that the giant would find solid ground on which to stand tall. No matter how clearly I understand the situation as an adult, my inner child continues to mourn the loss of its hero.

I'm about to hit the road for Cali, leaving Texas behind this upcoming Tuesday morning. Instead of finding an apartment in L.A., however, I am going to visit with family and friends for a week or so...and then resume driving. I am getting a place in Seattle with Scobra and Dion Vox of Ramona The Band. Scobra is going to record my next album over the next few months and Dion is going to show me a damn good time in her native locale! In May, I'm meeting up with Luke in Paris for his two-week block leave, then possibly visiting friends in Dubai and England, respectively. After that? Undecided. Maybe I'll go back to L.A., or maybe I'll stay based in Seattle a little longer. At any rate, traveling between L.A. and Seattle is far more economical than traveling anywhere from Texas. A tour with RTB could be in my future, but at the very least, I'm about to record a whole slew of new, sonically-intriguing songs for your listening pleasure. Stay tuned...

Yep, that's me destroying a guitar. Read about it here.

It's been a challenging week, but I'm trying to keep it together and move forward with strength. I've had several phone calls from Luke, which definitely helped. I anticipate that it will get easier and more difficult, all at once.

Tomorrow, I have a recording session with Billy Bowers in Killeen. Our goal was to get three songs down before I return to California and that's what we're gonna do! We recorded two of them last fall/early winter and then took a break so that Luke and I could finish up our own stuff and do the family thing. I really like the style - very ambient electronica, combining uptempo and downtempo to create a cool musical journey.

I'm visiting some dear friends in Austin next week before heading back to Los Angeles. I need all the wonderful people in my life now more than ever, and am grateful that so many friends have stepped forward to offer their love and support. It's a beautiful thing.

In April, I'm going up to Seattle to work on an album with Scobra. We have a lot of material "in the bank," so we'll refine some of the pre-existing songs and begin work on new stuff, as well. Out of everything, I'm really excited about that. His producing style is as unique as a fingerprint, making him somewhat of a Magic Man in my book. I have so much inside of me that I need to get out - short of Luke coming home, nothing could be better right now than having insanely good beats built for me to unload my heart upon.

Before any of that takes place, though, I need to submit my material to managers. Don't let me forget! I'm so scatterbrained right now and I need to get that done by the end of next week. I'm usually brilliant at multi-tasking, but right now, I find myself jumping from one activity to another without any sort of method to my madness. I did, however, write an appropriately cathartic song today while my car was getting tuned up. It's pretty straight-forward stuff, but it felt good to scribble something down nonetheless. See what you think...

Luke left tonight. Destination: Afghanistan. I feel like crawling into the woods to die like a wounded animal. The pain is indescribable, the tears plentiful. It is only because I have given him my entire self that I am able to hurt like this. He is hurting, too, of course, sorrowful over his decision to join the army, to put both of us through such heartache when the whole mess could have been cleanly avoided. We sobbed like devastated children in the moments leading up to parting, holding onto each other for dear life. Even through our tears, though, we were strong. United. Unwavering in the faith we have in one another and the joint existence we love to share.

For once in my life, the things I fear are quite rational and founded on real dangers. The worst thing I could do, however, is worry about things that have yet to occur...mainly because I can't afford to buy myself the facelift that I would most assuredly need after spending an entire year in a state of sheer panic! (Small joke.)

We were fortunate enough to spend the four-day weekend cocooned in each other's arms, bathing in the purest, most unabashed love in existence. Luke insists that I'll accomplish great things this year with music and get farther than ever before without him around to distract me. He doesn't mean that in a negative way, but the truth is, when two people unintentionally stumble upon the Holy Grail, it's kind of hard not to bask in all that true love entails. While I certainly came a long way last year with songwriting, recording, and performing, there was definitely the element of time. The clock was ticking, growing louder with every passing month as it brought us closer to this moment of farewell. Knowing that we were going to be apart for an entire year put many things into perspective. We soaked up every drop of bliss while we still could, stocking up on love like camels storing water in their humps in anticipation of the vast desert that lay ahead. And now?

I will write him every single day that we are apart. I will also throw myself into music like never before, increasing my focus tenfold. Music will keep me sane. It is my purpose in life and I am especially grateful for it in this moment of emotional injury. This will most likely be the most intimate blog entry you will read from me. From this day forward, most of my feelings concerning Luke's deployment will be put into song. I'll try not to be too much of a downer! Thanks for continuing to come along with me. I strongly feel that this year will yield some of my best work yet.

It feels great to be getting some songwriting done. I've teamed up with a production company in L.A. that shops songs to record labels for their artists. I managed to complete the first mix of the first song this morning and will polish up the vocals when I'm actually back in California. The songs are going to end up being far too "pop" for me to use as an artist - for better or worse, I don't see myself as being the popstar diva type. I'm learning to love that most of my songs aren't easily categorizable. As long as I'm staying true to myself and genuinely pouring my heart out, I'm happy. As far as the pop songs go - I'd be thrilled to make money by selling them to someone who's better suited to sing them. The lyrics are still honest and carry substance, but the character's more of the ass-shaking type. In case there was any confusion, I keep the ass-shaking to a minimum. Sorry.

I've been downloading every single song from every single Rush album ever made. I bought Luke an iPod for Christmas and have been spending weeks trying to fill it up with music he loves. He'll most likely be sick of all 4,000 songs after only two months in Afghanistan, but hopefully he'll be inspired to start creating his own music. We've pretty much gotten as much recording done together as we're capable of for the time being - his brain is fried. It's difficult for him to focus on playing guitar when he's about to go risk his life. The only thing that makes sense right now is physical and emotional closeness. Nothing else seems to matter during these last few days. His superiors are telling him that he'll have loads of down-time, though, so once he gets into the swing of things, he'll track down a guitar and resume playing. I put music-creating software on his laptop, so if he comes up with something cool while overseas, he'll be able to record it for later use.

I have two more illustrations to finish for the children's book. I'm hoping to get that done soon, but of course, that might have to wait until after Luke deploys. It's a struggle to keep my emotions in check. Every time I think about being without Luke, I tear up. If there's any couple in the world who could make it through this bullshit stronger and more in love than ever, though, it's us. Ready or not...

Although it was nice to be home in California for three weeks, it's even better to be back in Texas with Luke. The countdown to his deployment begins, yes, but we're in our own space in our own bed without the stress that other people's energy can impose. Trying to squeeze in multiple visits with all of our family and friends felt exhausting to me. I prefer spreading it out in a leisurely manner, not dealing with the guilt caused by some who are demanding of time. To top it off, there's an underlying mood of fear amongst our loved ones, wondering if Luke will make it back from war safely. The conversation was largely avoided by most, as though voicing their dread aloud would jinx it all. I've gotten to the point where I understand that it's out of my control and, if I can't change the circumstances, may as well accept things as they are and try to put my best foot forward. I hate war and know with all of my heart that we are being lied to about the reasons for being in the Middle East...but I love my husband and all that matters to me is that he returns safely. The issues I have with the U.S. government and their puppeteers will be productively put into song form and, perhaps, released after Luke is no longer in harm's way.

I didn't write or create music while on vacation and felt like crap as a result. Expressing myself through art is essential to my emotional survival in all kinds of weather. Pending Luke's amount of energy at the end of each day, we'll record a tiny bit more before he goes. He feels the need to record our duet - the one he wrote - before he deploys in case something does happen to him. As of now, he's set to leave on the 16th or 17th. His birthday is on the 12th, so I'm happy that we'll be together for that.

Sleep is hard to come by these days, so I hope I've written something semi-coherent! More to come when my head is clearer.

It's not easy to narrow it down to something as black and white as a list, but I tried. Also, I will continue to add on to this post over time, since I already know I'm forgetting a bunch of acts that I love. Leave your own list of favorites as a comment.


AC/DC
Ace of Base 
Beatles 
Bee Gees 
Beethoven 
Bill Withers 
Billy Idol 
Bob Seger 
Boston 
Bran Van 3000 
Breaking Benjamin 
Bush 
Cat Stevens
Chevelle
Cream 
Cyndi Lauper 
David Bowie 
Dean and Britta 
Dethklok 
Duran Duran
Fiona Apple 
Foo Fighters 
Foreigner 
Frank Sinatra 
George Michael 
Goldfrapp 
Guns N Roses
Heart 
Hole 
Incubus 
INXS
Janis Joplin 
Jimi Hendrix 
KISS 
Korn 
Led Zeppelin 
Marvin Gaye 
Mighty Mighty Bosstones 
Moody Blues 
Neil Diamond 
Nine Inch Nails 
NOFX 
Otis Redding 
Paul Simon
Peaches 
Perfect Circle, A 
Peter Gabriel 
Pink Floyd 
PJ Harvey
Pointer Sisters 
Portishead 
Queens of the Stone Age 
R.E.M. 
Radiohead 
Rage Against the Machine 
Ramona The Band 
Red Hot Chili Peppers 
Rilo Kiley 
Rush
Salt n Pepa 
Santana 
Silverchair 
Slick Rick 
Smokey Robinson 
Sneaker Pimps 
Sophie B. Hawkins 
Solomon Burke 
Spinnerette 
Streets, The 
Strokes, The 
Styx 
Sublime 
Supertramp 
Tears For Fears 
Tina Turner 
Tom Petty 
Tool 
Tori Amos 
Toto 
Van Halen 
Yes 
Zombies, The

Luke and I are in a town outside of Temecula for the weekend so he can visit his dad. I'm continuing to work on illustrating the children's book, which I'm happy to say is going well.

It's been a few days since I've written, sang, or recorded. My mom wrote a children's book and I'm illustrating.

I have the songs, the performances, and the growing fan base. Now I need a manager. My mom and my friend Mike Manasee have both offered - which I appreciate - but it's clear that I need someone who really knows their way around this ever-changing industry, someone who has connections and a clear vision of how to navigate these murky waters. At the moment, my focus is finishing up the job of recording my songs with Luke - if only to get scratch versions down - and spend what little time I have left with him before he deploys. As soon as he's gone, I will throw myself into the task of obtaining representation. It would be such bliss to solely create music and let someone else take care of the phone calls and e-mails!

I would rather see stand-up comedy than a live band. There, I said it.

I haven't gone to many concerts, and this is no accident. Yes, I love to support my musician friends when I can, but the truth is, it is difficult to kick back and enjoy the experience from the audience when I want more than anything to be the one onstage. It's like being a pitcher and sitting all nine innings on the bench. Growing up, I never had posters of bands or artists on my bedroom wall. While I was heavily influenced by every song I've ever heard and continue to be to this day, I have never idolized anyone. That's not to say that I don't have a great appreciation for what other artists do - I believe I have something to learn from anyone and everyone - but at the moment, I am very aware of my need to rise to the occasion. Perhaps after I've toured the world a few times and have deeply satisfied my yearning to perform, I'll be more content to take in live shows of acts that I admire. For now, it's almost too painful.

What I do enjoy is sketch and stand-up comedy. If someone makes me laugh involuntarily, they have my loyalty and devotion. Laughter is so much more important than many people give it credit for. Cliches about it being the best medicine are cliches for a reason. When I'm done working on music for the day, I scour youtube for random pieces of hilarity. Right now, Michael Ian Black has my heart. My sense of humor is somewhat warped, so when I find comedians who are on a similar wavelength, I am eternally appreciative. I await Dave Chappelle's return with baited breath.

I decided not to post a vlog this week. As fun as they are to do, I'm thinking about keeping the most popular ones up on youtube and deleting the rest. I don't want to over-saturate the vlogosphere. Instead, I'd like to bring it back every so often with important news and updates. With Luke leaving soon, I can already anticipate that filming those things will not be nearly as enjoyable without him answering the questions alongside me. I don't think they'll be as fun to watch, either. I DO think that it would be cool to interview my musician friends once in a while. When I go up to Seattle to visit Scobra and Dion Vox of Ramona The Band, it would be awesome to get them in front of the camera, as I think that they are both very interesting and talented people.

In the meantime, Luke and I will film two or three more vlogs before he deploys, so e-mail any questions you have to brittwarnermusic@yahoo.com. Thereafter, I'll most likely do the occasional Q&A right here on this blog. If you have some extra time on your hands, watch each of our vlog episodes and let me know which ones you enjoyed the most. Thanks for reading/watching!

Well, I did it. I finished 'Sea Debt' - for now. It will be remixed and mastered before it goes on an album, but for now, I'm very happy with it. While working on a song, I hear it soooooo many times, both in full length and in pieces, that after a few days, I lose all objectivity. My family seems to dig it, and since they have no problem being brutally honest when they DON'T like something I've done, I find their approval to be a very good measure of how well-received my work will be with the general public. Not always, of course, but often enough.

With that said, I am making 'Sea Debt' available as a free download for the next 24 hours. Simply click here. When the screen pops open, click "Download" in the upper right hand corner of the music player. If you enjoy this song, send it as an e-mail attachment to any of your friends and family who might enjoy it. The lyrics can be accessed from the music player, as well.

Thank you for listening!

Once in awhile, I come across a listing on TAXI that sounds perfectly suited to my style of music, and thusly, submit a song or two. It costs five dollars per song submission, and while that doesn't sound like a lot of money, it can add up pretty quickly if I'm not discerning enough. I just received an e-mail confirming that 'Let It Burn' has been forwarded to a music publisher for placement in film and TV. While this doesn't mean I "got the job," it's still encouraging and gives me hope that something might come out of it. If I heard that song in a movie...well, the level of giddiness elicited from my being would be enough to mortify anyone who happened to be in the room with me.

Sometimes I submit a song just to see what kind of feedback the TAXI reviewers give me. Their input is always highly constructive. Art is very personal when created with honesty and integrity and their suggestions never impede upon that. I plan on looking for a listing that I can submit 'Sea Debt' for, just to see what the reviewer has to say.

Speaking of 'Sea Debt,' it's been downloaded nearly 100 times so far from my Reverb Nation profile. Special thanks to Michael Santi and Michael Sherwood for promoting it everywhere. With ten hours to go, I'm hoping to reach an even higher number by midnight PST.

The next song I need to record is Luke's "Love Notes," in which we sing a duet. I'm soooo excited about that one. Thanks to Thanksgiving, we have a few consecutive days to give it our full focus. I can't wait.

~Britt~

Phew! I have been reworking 'Sea Debt' all day. It's been well-worth it, as I am so very happy with the results. Even though I'm itching to post it tonight, I think I'll exercise some self-restraint and wait 'til morning. I want to listen to it again after a good night's sleep, make whatever adjustments my ears desire, and then make it available everywhere. I am filled with a strong sense of accomplishment and pride...which won't last long. Haha. I've always been this way. I enjoy the fruits of my labor for five minutes and then feel the need to conquer another mountain. Being involuntarily ambitious is a pain in the ass!

Music production was put on hold for most of today so that Luke could sign his life away to me - haha. There's a lot of crap to take care of prior to a deployment, and becoming Luke's Power Of Attorney was on the agenda.

To be fair, I did offer to sign my life away to him as well, just to even out the deck, so to speak...but Luke declined. We're married - everything is already shared between us financially. This just ensures that I can sign on his behalf when need be.

Still refining 'Sea Debt.' I love it, and it's soooo cloooose to being done. Bear with me.






As for the outfit...well, that's just me refusing to give in to the mom-jeans apathy that pervades my current locale. Defy indifference!

Luke's pre-deployment vaccinations affected him rather adversely, so I spent most of the weekend taking care of him and editing our newest song, which I posted tonight. You can download 'Sea Debt' for free off of my Reverb Nation page here. My brother, Josh, always gives me helpful feedback on songs as they're developed. 'Sea Debt' was originally 100 bpm and had a western strumming style that I likened to Johnny Cash. Josh didn't think the guitar matched the vocals, which gave me yet another thing to meditate on during my insomnia-plagued evenings.

The following day, I asked Luke if he'd mind trying more of a harp-like picking, and he slowed down the pace in the process. At 80 bpm, the song is still only 2:39 minutes long, but I think the sound is very fitting now. Just guitar and vocals - Luke thinks that when we have a full band, it would be cool to speed it up and give it a pirate vibe - haha. The lyrics definitely lend itself to that line of thinking, but I'm very happy with its current, stripped-down mood. I believe the mark of a good song is being able to play it acoustically or with a full band and having it sound brilliant either way. (Alanis Morrisette tested this theory out on The Black-Eyed Peas' "My Humps". The result can be found in hilarious video form on youtube.)

So. Get your copy of 'Sea Debt' and follow along with the lyrics below. Feedback is always welcomed!